Food Allergy Anxiety

My experience with food allergy anxiety began when I was in fourth grade. I would get this gut wrenching feeling everyday, but I couldn’t pinpoint what it was. I slowly realized that it was triggered whenever there was food involved, or any other way that I could have a reaction due to cross contact. I struggled with that feeling for a couple months before I told anyone. If people asked if I was fine, I’d just say “Yes,” and they would leave me alone. Finally, one day, my mom asked me if I was okay, and I told her, “I’m nervous.” She asked me, “Nervous about what?” I told her that I didn’t know. After a few questions, I told her that it was because of my allergies, and I was scared I was going to have a reaction. She told me that I’d be okay and that what I was feeling was called anxiety. She continued by telling me that she had anxiety too and that she would schedule me an appointment with a therapist. I went to see my therapist once a week for two months, and by the end of it, I felt so much better. I learned different coping mechanisms and not to overthink everything. Since then, I haven’t had any major spells with anxiety caused by my food allergies. If there was one thing I learned, it would be, don't be afraid to ask for help. There’s always someone who is willing to help you and truly cares about you.

-Thomas, 16 years old from Syracuse, NY

I am allergic to dairy, egg, and kiwi. When I was younger, I never truly understood how serious food allergies were. I always thought that I just couldn't eat certain foods and that was it. But, as I got older and started to learn more and take more control of dealing with them, I started to get really scared. I would limit my social activities because I was too scared to go and be around my allergens, even though the situation would probably be under control. I didn't want to try new foods because I was scared and I was constantly worried about having a reaction. I still have a lot of anxiety today, but I have learned to control it. One trick I have learned is to distract myself for at least 30 minutes after I try a new food, so that I don't think about having a reaction and I can keep worries out of my mind. Another coping tool is if you find yourself worrying with thoughts that start with "what if" such as, "What if I have a reaction to this food?" , ask yourself "what else?" Just saying this simple phrase can take away worries and cause your thoughts to instead be things like, "Maybe I will love this new food and I can eat it all the time! " or, "I have eaten from this brand a million times, this time isn't any different than the others." Above all, it's most important to express any worries you might have to either your parents or someone else you can trust because they can help you. Never be embarrassed or afraid. I hope these tips are helpful to you.

-Lauren Cohen, 15 years old

I was diagnosed with food allergies when I was two years old. My parents generally handled my allergies when I was young, as I didn’t understand until I was a bit older what ‘being allergic’ meant. Once I started dealing with my allergies by myself, I started to realize just how dangerous and just how proactive I have to be to keep myself safe. Over the past couple of years I’ve noticed a slight increase in my anxiety about my allergies. I’ve done a few projects about food allergy bullying and the severity of food allergies, educating some of my classes about food allergies in general. Through my research I’ve heard a lot of sad and scary stories about other people’s experiences, and I think this heightened my fear of having a reaction. I also had my first allergic reaction in several years in early 2019, which scared me a lot because I was told that all precautions had been taken to make my food safe. Evidently, that was not true. I started to get really scared whenever we went out to eat after that, and I would make myself so worried that most of the time I wouldn’t eat anything. The intense fear has faded a bit, but I still get anxious every now and then, and I’m definitely more cautious than I was. Some things I’ve been doing to ease my anxiety about eating out are to ask lots of questions, read other food-allergy customers’ reviews of the restaurant, and work on communication. Never be afraid to ask questions to the wait staff, manager, or chef when you’re at a restaurant. Reading about other people’s experiences at a restaurant is always great too--just make sure you read multiple reviews to get a good sense of how the place handles allergies. If you know you’re going somewhere new, you can always call ahead and ask if they can accommodate. As with most things, communication is key. Talk to your servers, chef, or manager, and if you don’t feel comfortable, talk to the people you’re with and let them know. Hopefully this helps! Just know you’re not alone in being anxious.

-Emily, 15 years old, Clifton Park, New York

I am severely allergic to multiple foods including peanuts. Ten years ago, as a kindergartener, I accidentally ate someone else’s peanut butter sandwich at school, thinking it was my own lunch. Long story short, I had to be given my Epipen in the nurse’s office and carried out of school on a stretcher. I was fine that day. I returned home from the hospital safely. But suddenly, my six year old mind had changed forever. All of a sudden, school wasn’t a place where I felt safe. I was terrified anytime I left my parent’s side, and I refused to eat anything resembling peanut butter (even the safe alternatives). Even until recently, I have avoided social scenarios involving food because I’ve been afraid to speak up for myself. I had a constant nagging fear in the back of my head, wondering if I could trust the people around me - and myself- to keep me safe.

It took me a long time to get over this anxiety. Even now, after years of therapy and many other strategies, I still find myself nervous around food sometimes. But I have an extensive list of coping mechanisms that allow me to live my life. I know strategies of mindful breathing and meditation to control my anxiety. I have practiced advocating for myself in many different scenarios and know how to explain what I need to people. I wear an allergy bracelet and ALWAYS carry my Epipen. Anxiety around food allergies is not something to ignore. It is a common response to a very serious condition, but with the right resources, it is nothing to be afraid of!

-Sophie, 16 years old

My struggle with anxiety began when I was in 3rd grade. Previously that year I had been hospitalized and it triggered my anxiety. My anxiety started off as just straight fear. Fear of leaving my house, of going to school, of interacting with people, and most of all fear of my allergens. Whenever my family would go out to eat, no one at our table would eat one of my allergens; however, if someone at a neighboring table had a meal that contained one of my allergens I would freak out. To help deal with these problems I saw a social worker at my school. She gave me some tips and tricks to get my mind off of things. For example, there was an imaginary box in my brain and whenever I thought of something that triggered my anxiety, I would lock it up in that box. Following these sessions, I felt much better and I was back to my “old” self. I continued to use the mental tricks I was taught back in 3rd grade. Unfortunately when I got older, the overthinking started. In 8th grade I had an allergic reaction and I ended up going to the hospital. Following this incident, eating out for me was a nightmare. I would get intense pains in my stomach that I only ever got before tests. I began to recognize these pains as nerves. And being older, I knew that I could no longer lock these things in a mental box because no matter what, I would overthink things. Once high school started, I began to take a step back and tried to look at my allergies from a different perspective. This made me realize that I really can lock my worries and anxiety into a box, I just have to remember to open that box after the fact. For example, going out to dinner and having one of my family members order shellfish, my allergen, instead of worrying, I take my anxiety and lock it tight into a box. That night, before I go to bed, I look at my worry, which is usually having a reaction, and then I look at the outcome, which is that I did not have one. Doing this calms me down because I see that my anxieties are not necessary. I still use this to cope with all my anxieties and now, I am almost a junior in high school.

-Erika Schroeder

I am going into 8th grade in the fall. I am allergic to dairy, and it has been a struggle throughout my life. I am always anxious about my food allergy, but I can recall a specific time when I was extremely anxious. A few years ago, I participated in my school play. Afterwards, my friends invited me out to celebrate. We went to a frozen yogurt place right across from the school. By the time I got there, most of my friends were already there. I was feeling nervous because there were a lot of kids there. There was one machine that was safe for me. My mom checked with one of the staff and they gave her a binder with all the ingredients. What I didn’t realize is that because there were so many kids there, there was a strong possibility for cross-contact. When I got my sorbet, there was some hanging off the side of my cup. I took my finger and I ate it thinking it was safe. After that, I had a reaction and it was very scary. Luckily, I had my autoinjector with me. I used it and called an ambulance. I was really embarrassed and scared. Since then, I am always scared to try new things and to eat the food that I already know is safe for me to have. I don’t eat at restaurants anymore because of it. To help ease my anxiety, I make sure that I carry my autoinjectors with me at all times. Also, when I am feeling anxious I talk about it to my parents, sister, and friends, and that really helps.

-Shaelyn, 13 years old

I’m allergic to peanuts and treenuts. When I was 4, I became best friends with a girl who also had a peanut allergy. Our friendship worked out well because I was really outgoing and talkative and she was more shy and quiet, except around me. We also bonded over our allergy and would always look out for each other. I never really had food allergy anxiety because I always speak up and am not afraid to ask people whether anything may contain peanuts or tree nuts. My friend, however, used to be shy so it was harder for her to speak up and she had a lot more anxiety about it than me. When our parents would take us out to eat, she wouldn’t eat anything, even if her food was made in a completely different area of the kitchen where no nuts have been. Eventually, she started speaking up more and has learned that having an allergy means having to speak up to keep yourself safe. She has gotten a lot better at eating out, she still sometimes gets anxious about it, but has grown a lot and I’m really proud of her for that.

-Amelia Elliott

I'm allergic to peanuts, tree nuts, dairy, eggs, soy, avocado, banana, kiwi, coconut, rice, peas, and chocolate. I've had allergies since I was diagnosed at six months, and I've struggled with allergy related anxiety since kindergarten. I used to be terrified of touching anything that had my allergen on it. Terrified. I still get nervous coming into contact with my allergens, but now I know nothing bad will happen personally for me (unless, of course, it's any type of nut or eggs), and I will just be sure to wash my hands thoroughly after coming into contact with anything. Because of my food allergies, I have never been able to eat the same thing as everyone else, and as a result, have faced many questions and comments about my food over the years. When I was younger, I hated getting asked questions about my food because I was extremely shy. Eating around other people made me nervous because I knew I would get asked questions, and I didn't want to deal with that. I was also told many times that my food looked gross or smelled bad, which hurt. Eventually, I started hiding what I was eating so that I wouldn't get any questions or comments on it. That habit was something I didn't break until last summer. I was in a program that required us to eat together (it was a group of 8) and we weren't allowed to hide our food. It was really scary for me, but that was when I realized that no one really was paying attention to me and what I was eating. That realization helped me a lot. My biggest advice for navigating your food allergy related anxiety is to challenge it however you can. Once I stopped hiding behind my lunchbox during lunchtime, I was able to more actively engage in conversations around me, and even forget about my anxiety for a while. I have had the realization that as long as I am careful, I will personally be okay. We live with a life threatening condition, and any anxiety and fear you experience are perfectly valid and expected. Just don't let it stop you from living life.

-Alia, 17 years old